Always and Forever
by SummerStarWatcher
Summary: Rose and Tom through the ages. Looking at their lives, together and apart, everyone could see that this was always and forever going to happen. It was just a matter of how they got there.


**A/N: **This takes a bit of explaining. It's a songfic, based on that song mentioned in one of the blog posts, called (Everything I Do) I Do It For You by Bryan Adams. This story is essentially a bunch of short scenarios pertaining to each set of lyrics, compiled together here. The scenarios are based on bits from the books, the blog posts, tweets, and some are my imaginings about the future. It's not meant to be just one reality, as there are several future possibilities suggested here, but for the most part it's all cohesive.

Lyrics are italicized.

Enjoy! Reviews are always much appreciated. ^_^

~Star

XXXXX

_Look into my eyes, you will see  
What you mean to me_

The sniffling gave her away. Caddy bent down to peer under the bed, finding Rose squished into the back corner and glaring fiercely at her.

"I'm busy," growled Rose.

Caddy nodded sympathetically and left, wishing that Tom could've seen her anyway. Because in the depths of Rose's eyes, she'd seen just how much Tom meant to her little sister. And she knew that, if he had seen it too, he'd never be able to forget her. Ever.

_Search your heart, search your soul  
And when you find me there  
You'll search no more_

"They are all for Tom really," Rose said, putting the finishing touches on one of her Valentine's Day cards.

Indigo sighed. Tom. Rose would always be waiting for him, having decided years ago (consciously or unconsciously) that he would be the only one for her, ever.

If only Tom felt the same. But he was too busy over in America, running through girlfriends like mad, trying to find 'The One.'

It was probably about time someone told the man that he'd already met the perfect girl, had already charmed her into love. Instead of searching the world and searching his heart for the one meant to be his, he could be complete.

Knowing Tom, though, that would take years to happen.

_Don't tell me, it's not worth tryin' for_

_You can't tell me, it's not worth dyin' for_

On the way home, in her little red car with the top open and the wind in our hair, Sarah and I sang together many songs with loud and wonderful harmonies. And we laughed and laughed and laughed.

When we pulled up in front of the Banana House, Sarah sobered. "How do you do it, Rose?"

"Do what?" I asked her.

"Keep loving Tom. Even through all of this."

I thought about denying it. I didn't want to admit to anyone how much I loved him, didn't want to commit to words all of the awful, complicated feelings I had. Didn't want anyone else to know my secrets.

But Sarah wanted a real answer, and she had been kind to me. So I shrugged, and did the best I could.

"Because. As bad as nights like tonight might be, not loving him would be worse."

Some things are worth anything.

_You know it's true  
Everything I do, I do it for you_

I couldn't remember the last time I'd been this happy. Finally, things were back together, as they never had been before. I had my family, both my families. The Levins and the Cassons, home together for Christmas. It was all that I could've hoped for.

Because really, my life in America, was pretty good. In fact, it was really only missing one thing.

Rose.

And so, when my parents came to me and said "Tom, you can have anything you want for Christmas," I chose so quickly that they had no choice but to give me what I wanted.

"Rose," I said immediately, almost before they had finished offering.

They looked at each other. "You want to go to England?" my dad confirmed.

"Yes." I said, nodding adamantly. "England."

And so there we were, at last, in England. I stood on the doorstep nervously, adjusting my guitar.

The door opened, and there she was, my Rose, looking quite astonished to find me there on her doorstep. I couldn't believe she had never guessed what I was getting for Christmas; it had been painfully obvious to the others right from the start.

"Tom!" she shrieked, pulling me into the house so quickly I almost fell over.

"Hello, Permanent Rose!" I said, flashing a grin. She never failed to make me happy.

"But what time is it in New York?" she asked, almost like a reflex.

"What does it matter what time it is in New York?" I asked. "I'm not in New York. I'm here."

And I was. Days, we spent there, nearly two weeks. Two blissful weeks, filled with everyday happy things, nothing truly extraordinary.

But Rose didn't have to be extraordinary to be perfect.

And it was one of those days, lying there on the floor in the Banana House with my guitar, that I started singing a song.

"How you gonna get see-through with your eyes wide open?"

Oh, Rose. So naïve, so gullible, so endearingly innocent. I sang the next lines without even thinking.

"When you came to New York

you were

my favorite person in New York."

It was not until ages later, days and weeks and months and even years, that I realized quite how true that is.

_Look into your heart, you will find  
There's nothin' there to hide_

If there's one thing Rose didn't do, it was hide what was in her heart. From the moment she met Tom, she was blissfully unaware of the rest of the world in love, all those people who would hide and cheat and lie about those deep feelings.

For if there was one thing Rose was good at, it was loving. Heart open, arms thrown wide, Rose loved her world more deeply and fiercely than anyone else, and wasn't afraid to show it.

"Haven't you any shame?" asked Sarah, perplexed and Rose's uncaring consideration of social conventions.

"Me?"

"Yes."

"About Tom?"

"Yes."

"No." Rose went back to placidly making her Valentine's Day cards, leaving Saffy and Sarah struck by just how honest Rose was, with herself and the world.

To Rose it was perfectly natural, of course. After all, what was there really to hide?

_Take me as I am, take my life  
I would give it all, I would sacrifice_

She would never, ever, ever let anyone see her this way. In fact, she would never even mention these moments of weakness when the darkness crept in and caught her up in its claws. There were days when she wanted nothing more than to scream and fight and kick the universe into giving her what she wanted, and there were days when even getting out of bed was a challenge.

She loved her life, she truly did, but sometimes it seemed that nothing was worth it without him. He already had her heart; why not take her life as well?

She'd give anything for things to go back to the way they used to be, years and years and years ago, when he still remembered her and cared about her. She'd give anything.

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for

Rose went crazy. She pulled herself free from her tormentors and kicked and lashed like a wild thing.

"It's that kid sister of Indigo Casson's," she heard someone say. "I warned him! Get her!"

Nobody got Rose. She got them instead, starting with the two who had pulled her back from under the wheels of the van. While they were still protesting, she attacked the one who had saved the guitar from being smashed entirely, and then, in her misery, she fought indiscriminately.

All she could think about was Tom. She had wrecked his guitar, and now these boys were grabbing her, the very same ones that had beat up Tom and Indigo at school. At last she had the chance to do something to help them, late though it might be.

With every swing and bite, she thought of him, her brown-haired guitar-playing best friend, the boy who would soon be leaving her forever, the one who would be beyond upset that she'd hurt his guitar.

She'd do anything for him, beat up all these boys and then race to the music store and make them put it right again, and give him a shining guitar that would somehow make up for the fact that he couldn't have the black one, and he'd be so happy that he wouldn't even leave and go back to New York, he'd stay right there in England with her.

If she'd only been a little bit older, she'd have understood that this wasn't a fight she could win.

_I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more_

"Rose," Indy said "I have to talk to you about Tom."

"No," I said. "No you don't. I know you just want to say something about how Tom didn't send me a Valentine again this year, but you really don't have to because I don't care anymore and in fact I think the whole holiday should be banned. So."

"Rose—"

"And I don't want to hear anything about how he just forgot because we both know he didn't just forget about me, _Tom_ doesn't just forget about _me._ He decided not to send one and so don't even try to excuse him this year because I don't want to hear it."

"No, Rose, I—"

"AND I don't want to hear about how Tom does still like me because that would just take the cake. I know you know—"

"ROSE!"

I stopped, startled.

"Shut up and listen."

Still stunned into silence, I did.

"Tom is eighteen. And you are thirteen." Yes, this is true. "And Rosy Pose, think about it. It is five long years in between."

Five. Five years. It's only five years.

It's five whole years.

All of a sudden I see Tom riding away from me, carried by a wave of time. Stretching further and further, impossibly far into the distance, and then he is gone.

No, it's okay. I'll turn a year older and then it will be only four years. Maybe if I grow up fast enough I can catch up to him.

"No," Indigo said. "That's not how it works, Rosy Pose. I'm sorry."

"Never? You can't be –you mean, I won't ever—he won't—_never?_"

"Oh, Rose. Someday, five years will seem like a lot less. Not never. But right now…"

It didn't matter, Indy's _someday_. What mattered was the enormous wall that had suddenly sprung up between Tom and me, the wall that can't be scaled.

And at that moment, there was nothing I wanted more than to be just a few years older.

_You know it's true  
Everything I do, I do it for you_

Bill looked at his daughter, finally sound asleep after her trip. He sighed. It was so like Rose, to suddenly decide she wanted nothing more than to go gallivanting off to a rock festival with no one but teenage boys to watch after her. He had been so mystified about it for so long, not being able to think of a single reason for Rose to want to go to a festival of music she didn't even like.

It made no sense.

At least, until she got back.

She wandered around the house like a zombie, long after Indigo had fallen into bed (15 seconds after they had gotten home), doing her very best to stay awake. He couldn't understand her single mindedness in remaining awake, even though she kept falling asleep. In the car on the way home, in the bath, even while eating a snack. And yet every time, she forced herself back awake.

"Go to bed," Bill told her, unable to understand why she was doing this to herself.

And then she sat down at the computer. "I just have to write one email," she explained. And then it all made sense.

Of course, he really should've seen it before. In fact, he should've known that's what the whole trip was about.

"Ah," he said, and left her to it.

It was Tom. Of course it was. With Rose, everything was always about Tom.

It reminded him of a song, one he knew very well. It described Rose and Tom so perfectly that even Eve had commented on it once.

Checking on Rose, Bill discovered her fast asleep, head resting on the keyboard of the computer. He picked her up gently, absentmindedly beginning to whistle the song. When she stirred in his arms, though, he stopped. Bill might not have known his daughter as well as he could have, but he knew she always got defensive about Tom. No need to rock the boat, he thought. Eventually, they'll work things out together.

He'd always known they would.

_There's no love, like your love  
And no other could give more love_

I haven't forgotten Tom. I haven't, I haven't. But Ollie makes me laugh. He never gets stressed. He never goes off in a huff. He never says, "I must have that guitar and only that one though it costs a million pounds."

He is nice.

But still. Nice as he is, a part of me is always comparing him with Tom. Always.

"Tom would've just killed those kids," I said without thinking, after leaving the park with Ollie.

"Who's Tom?" Ollie asked. "Oh. Don't tell me. I think I probably know."

He did know.

But he didn't like it.

"Rose," he said one day. "Rose, I think you are a fantastic girl. But," he continued, "I do not think that you think I am fantastic."

I was a bit slow on contradicting him.

"No, Rose. It's okay, I understand. It was nice going out with you for a bit, but I know I'll never replace Tom." And then he left.

And I let him go.

Because in the end, it was true.

No one can be instead of Tom.

_There's nowhere, unless you're there  
All the time, all the way _

I only went so I could tell.

Because me being there, seeing everything, hearing everything, _feeling _everything, almost made it seem like he was there too. I could practically hear him next to me, remarking on everything with his usual charming sarcasm, chatting with Indy and David and MarcusJoshPatrick.

And somehow, that made everything better, everything more real.

_Look into your heart baby_

It was time for a major life reevaluation. By all accounts, my life here was perfect. Apartment, successful band, hot girlfriend, loads of friends, a future. Perfect.

But it wasn't. Something felt wrong, and it was screwing everything up.

I didn't really want to think about it, but it had gotten to the point where I couldn't ignore this anymore.

All it took was one quick look inside to see what I had been missing this whole time. And really, I had never thought it would be anything else.

Rose.

Oh, you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for  
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more

I don't know what to do. I haven't talked to Tom for two years, three months, one week, and six days. And it's killing me.

I need to see him. I don't even care if he doesn't want to see me, or if I have to see him with Meg, or if he doesn't talk to me at all. I just have to see him, because I was never meant to go this long without him.

I have got to go to New York.

I told Indigo this, and he said It Is About Darn Time.

"What do you mean?" I demanded.

"Two years is too long," he said. "You should've gone ages ago, should've made him remember you. He's being a stubborn idiot, and there's no one better to cure him of that than another stubborn idiot."

"Oh, thanks."

He just smiled. "Go get him, Rosy Posy."

And you know what? I will.

Because even if he hasn't accepted that he needs me, I know I need him. And I know he needs me too.

And I'm not going to stop until I've made him accept that.

I would fight for you

"Weird Meg has got to go," she stated, stomping through the front door and overturning my life in fewer words than I would have thought possible.

"What?" said Meg herself, coming in from the other room. "What are you talking about?"

"You!" Rose said accusingly, glaring. "You have got to go." Then she turned to me, pointing her finger threateningly. "I've had just about enough of this nonsense; I'm not going to put up with you being such an idiot anymore!"

"Um, excuse me?" Meg planted her fists on her hips and glared back at Rose. "Just who do you think you are, coming in here and ordering us about?"

I could've groaned. That was probably the worst approach to take with an angry Rose; there was little hope for Meg any more.

"I'm Rose, you may have forgotten me. But I certainly haven't forgotten about you. You see, I've been waiting for life to batter Tom here back into an acceptable form of humanity—"

Ouch.

"—but it's taking so long I figured I had to help life out a little bit. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like my Tom back."

God, Rose was hot when she was angry…

"_Your_ Tom? _Your Tom_? Ha. If he'd wanted you, he'd have come to you ages ago." Meg's voice was rising in anger, getting squeakier and squeakier. I'd always kinda hated that about her…

"Tom's just a little bit confused right now," Rose explained patronizingly to Meg.

It was at this point that my brain finally caught up to what was happening. Rose, appearing out of nowhere in New York and challenging Meg. For me. And now they were about ready to start a cat fight, right in front of me.

"I don't know what you think you're going to do," Meg hissed, "but Tom's not leaving me. Right, Tom?" And she looked at me for confirmation.

Shit. How could I tell her that Rose had just given me the perfect opportunity to get out of this relationship? I'd only been staying with Meg because of habit, because I thought there was no chance for me elsewhere (_with Rose)_. But now that Rose had chosen to fight, had shown just how much it meant to her…

"Ahhh…." My hesitation was obvious as I looked from Meg to Rose.

Rose smirked. "See? I don't even know why he's stayed with you so long."

Meg glared. "He's going to keep staying with me, just wait and see."

I sighed. This wasn't exactly how I'd have chosen it, but… "She's right." I looked up into Meg's eyes, just in time to see her triumphant grin.

"I don't know why I've stayed with you for so long."

Meg's face fell, but I found I couldn't really care. Not while Rose was here, right in front of me and looking so gorgeous.

I held open my arms, and she practically jumped into them.

"I'm never leaving you to work something out on your own again," she murmured in my ear. "It takes too frickin' long, you idiot."

And then I kissed her.

_I'd lie for you  
Walk the wire for you  
Yeah I'd die for you_

Rose slipped out of the store. Then she dodged across the crowded pavement, glanced behind her to check she had not been followed, and sprinted in front of six lanes of Saturday-morning traffic.

Cars braked, horns blared, people shouted, and a bus driver swerved and swore. On the far pavement Tom turned to see what all the commotion was about. He was just in time to catch Rose as she landed triumphantly on the curb in front of him.

From high up on some nearby scaffolding a small group of workmen broke into applause.

Tom looked up at them with a quick, unwilling grin. Rose took no notice at all, but beamed at Tom and announced, "I wanted to see you!"

"It certainly seems like you did!" agreed Tom, looking meaningfully into the road where the traffic was just beginning to untangle itself again. He couldn't believe she'd done that, just leapt into the road simply because she'd wanted to see him.

No one had ever done something like that for him.

And no one besides her would ever do something like that again.

_You know it's true_  
_Everything I do, I do it for you_

"Permanent Rose—"

The coolest name on the planet, Tom thought to himself, smiling down at her and paying no attention to his surroundings. She looked radiant, practically glowing with happiness. He'd never seen anyone so beautiful before in his entire life. He could hardly even believe that she was finally his, and yet, he had always known this was going to happen. Always and forever.

Her mouth formed a few words, words he didn't quite catch, and his thoughts were derailed by the lush pinkness of her lips. He couldn't wait to kiss her again…

And then it was his turn to speak, based on her suddenly expectant look. Without looking away from her, he responded. "I do."

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."

And he did.

Every day for the rest of their lives.


End file.
